BDSM Library of story by a real submissive slave's

Housewife bondage

2009-05-09T00:03:00.000-07:00

I feel completely sure that these exclusive porn movies dedicated to housewife bondage will bring you really sweet pleasure. Sure, right here you can witness a couple of submissive slave girls get tied and dildo fucked by nasty master right in front of the camera. Experienced punisher knows a great deal of means of causing slaves pain mixed with pleasure. And he decides to tie both of obedient slave chicks this time. Look, naughty girls are forced to sit on huge vibrators and feel fucking excited of that. Somehow or other, none of two slave cuties can prevent nasty fellow from doing with them everything what he wants to. You better don’t even try to resist the temptation of watching these vids featuring two slave girls get tied and dildo fucked during housewife bondage

submissive slave suimei

2009-04-05T08:10:00.000-07:00

suimei is a gorgeous slave girl. She's been featured on a lot of bdsm mov site and we're ies extremely pleased to have her on this scenee. suimei, has a fantastic little body and just oozes sexuality... Dressed in herblack collar Removing her clothing next, she reveals a stunning figure complete with a nice perky set of tits and a sweet little ass. When we hand suimei the ball gag, she tentatively puts it in her mouth not entirely sure what may come next. Luckily for us, the wait isn't long as we bind her tits in red rope and tie her hands behind her back. Next, we tie Riley to the Sybian cowgirl style and crank the Cumbot to high and watch Riley cum explosively

Rules of steel bondage

2009-03-03T23:13:00.000-08:00

For those who like realism in bondage, there is no substitute for steel -- handcuffs and leg irons. Leather and rope can both be cut, not made secure and dangerously tight. Unfortunately, many tops who use handcuffs are not familiar with their tools. This can cause damage to their prisoners. If followed, the rules below will allow tops and bottoms to enjoy their scenes more.

1. DON'T BUY CHEAP HANDCUFFS.
Most cheap cuffs can be easily broken or forced open. A good pair of handcuffs bought in a police-supply store or ordered from a reputable specialty supplier will cost little mere than junk cuffs sold by porn shops. For modern-style U.S.-made cuffs, look for those from Peerless, Smith & Wesson, Jay-Pee, or the American Handcuff Co. The best old-style (non-swing-through) cuffs are Hiatts (made in England).

2. DON'T GET TAKEN BY RIP-OFF STORES.
Smith & Wesson high-security cuffs cost a bit more, as do specialty models such as hinged cuffs.

3. DON'T BUY CUFFS WITHOUT A DOUBLE-LOCK MECHANISM.
Usually, the set-look is closed by inserting the pointed tip of the handcuff key into a small hole on the top of the lock ease of the cuffs; the setlock is opened by turning the key backward in the normal keyhole. Don't buy cuffs with lever-operated set-locks, which are typical of cheap manufacture. Lever-operated set-locks can easily open unintentionally and become loose and unreliable after a period of use.

4. ALWAYS DOUBLE-LOCK CUFFS AFTER THEY HAVE BEEN APPLIED.
Cuffs that have not been double-locked can tighten on the wrists if the prisoner struggles or changes position and thereby cause damage to the nerves.

5. DON'T MAKE CUFFS TOO TIGHT.
The point of steel bondage is that it doesn't *have* to be tight to be secure. Don't tighten cuffs more than necessary; as long as the cuff won't slip off, it's tight enough. It should still be easy to move the cuff on your prisoner's wrist after it is locked and set; assuming no tension is applied to the fastening point, the cuff bows should not press into the skin at any point.

6. NEVER SUSPEND YOUR PRISONER BY STEEL RESTRAINTS OR MAKE THE PRISONER LIE ON HIS/HER CUFFED WRISTS.
This can cause serious nerve damage. Suspending the arms above the head with steel cuffs, even with feet or body firmly planted on the floor, can cause damage if the tension is great or the position held for more than a few minutes.

7. DON'T APPLY HANDCUFFS BY SWINGING THEM TOWARD THE WRISTS FROM A DISTANCE.
You can break someone's wrist or arm that way. The outer edge of the cuff should just touch the wrist as you apply it; a short downward snap will swing the bow up through the locking part of the cuff and then back down and around the wrist. Practice snapping cuffs onto yourself until you get the technique down right. If it hurts you, it's going to hurt your prisoner.

8. CUFF THE HANDS BEHIND THE BACK.
Unless secured otherwise, cuffs attached in front can be a dangerous weapon. For s/m scenes where the highest security is less important than minimizing unnecessary danger to the bottom, it is better to fasten handcuffs behind the back so the palms are facing each other, making any tension on the cuffs affect only the less-vulnerable outer sides of the wrists. Palms-out behind the back offers better security (that's why cops are trained to do it that way) but is riskier and less comfortable.

9. DON'T TIGHTEN LEG IRONS.
Leg irons don't have to be tight to stay on. If they are, the bottom won't be able to walk, and the pressure could damage the Achilles tendons or bruise the ankles. Leg irons over boots are best if the prisoner will have to move around in them.

10. KEEP EXTRA KEYS HANDY.
Nothing can ruin a scene quicker than trying to remove the bottom's restraints (or those you've put on yourself) and finding that you can't locate the keys.

slave's self restrained

2009-01-31T07:49:00.000-08:00

A slave dream of self restrain has finally come to reality as she self pleasured and self punish her self into an extreme bdsm lifestyle experience. Unlike any other this scene is a rare treat that is unusual because of it ubique style of bdsm lifestyle but in this case it is different because she is doing a self restrained orgasm as she became her own master and own sub slave.

Submissive or slave?

2008-11-20T21:02:00.001-08:00

As I wrote in a previous post, I was feeling lost. I knew my purpose was to serve and please him, but I didn't know how to fulfill that purpose. I needed to know how to serve him better, how to be what he wanted me to be... heck, I needed to know what he wanted me to be. I needed guidance and direction, and most of all control.

So, Griz and I sat down and talked about things… where we wanted to go with our D/s and what each of us wanted out of it. And here's where we ended up: the goal is for me to completely surrender my will to him, to put myself under his control 24/7. Ultimately, our goal is to have a total power exchange relationship. This won't happen for us overnight. I need to learn to trust him more and obey him even when it doesn't suite me. I don't want to be his sometime submissive, I want to be his submissive all the time... which brings me to a topic I've been struggling with recently...

Submissive or slave?

When Griz and I first talked about moving toward a TPE relationship, he phrased it as a "Master/slave" dynamic. And I hesitated, because I've never seen myself as a slave, and I like identifying myself as a submissive. I had thought of a slave is more of an object and while I love the idea of Griz treating me like an object some of the time, I honestly don't see how we could keep up that dynamic all the time and still have a loving marriage. Slave also has sexual connotations to me, like sex slave, whereas submission is about all of it - the sex and the service. I feel like his slave during heavy play, but not when I'm fixing him dinner. I realize this is a highly charged subject about which many knowledgeable slaves and submissives and masters have written about, so I'll just preface this by saying these are only my opinions.

To get to the bottom of my feelings about being his slave, he gave me assignment to learn more about M/s by reading online and talking with a couple of other slaves or submissives. My good friend, padme, and my new friend martha were kind enough to listen to me and answer my questions. They were both so patient with me and thoughtful in their responses- thank you so much! My basic question was, what is the difference between a slave and a submissive? Both padme and martha said they started out as submissives, and eventually became slaves, and they both characterized being a slave as a more intense form of their submission... which is what I read on some of the websites I visited. Some people view being a slave as an extreme form of submission, others view slavery as something completely different from submission. There seem to be a lot of different opinions and definitions out there. One of the main differences between a slave and a submissive seems to be limits. Many of the websites I read said that submissives work within a framework of limitations, whereas slaves have no limits. But padme brought up a good point in that most (if not all) people have some limits, even if it's only one, even slaves. Are there slaves out there who would kill themselves or someone else if their Master commanded it? Maybe, but I think there are very few of them. So, I don't think a slave can be defined by limits, what someone will or won't do. After talking with padme and martha, I think being a slave is more of a state of mind than a set of actions. I think being a slave is an extreme, much more intense form of submission, but still fundamentally submission.

So with all that being said, does it matter what words Griz and I choose to define our relationship? I don't think it does. I am HIS, His good girl, His submissive, His slave, His lover, His friend, His (almost) wife. That's all that matters.

Slave training

2008-11-19T21:19:00.000-08:00

Slave training is a BDSM activity usually involving a consensual power exchange between two people taking on the roles of a master or mistress and a slave. Typically this involves changing the slave's behavior in a manner that is pleasing to the master or mistress, perhaps instructing the slave to follow a set of rules that the master or mistress has set out.

Slave training is a learning process both for the slave (or submissive) and for the master or mistress, or dominant. Training will usually be set out and defined clearly before it begins. The master or mistress will teach the slave how to speak, act and think in a way that is pleasing to them. The slave, in return, gets pleasure from being able to make their master or mistress happy. Or, the slave gets a reward like food, a bed, etc.

In some instances, in more extreme relationships, it may also involve some forms of aversion training. This could include use of spanking, cropping or clamping to encourage compliance, and to permit the slave to find an excuse for complying in their own minds. This can be challenging for the dominant, because if the "slave" being trained is also a masochist, they may enjoy punishment, therefore punishment may need to be withheld rather than applied, to create the unpleasant result that the punishment requires.

Gorgeous submissive slave

2008-11-06T03:06:00.000-08:00

Here is one of the most gorgeous submissive slave i have ever seen! She just capture my heart for i fall in love with this gorgeous slave while she is tied and helpless i just cant stop envying her master for having such a great slave as she is. Naked tied in a rope and wearing her collar this slave really brings out the best in me and i want to punish her for being such a gorgeous slave i just want to dominate her and give her a nice bondage sex to pleasure a nice and gorgeous submissive slave.

Slave's pleasure time

2008-10-26T04:43:00.000-07:00

A true Master shall take pride in the fact that a woman has chosen to devote her entire being to the satisfaction and fulfillment of his desires. Just as she, in return, can take pride that such a man has chosen her, above all others to provide that fulfillment. For openers, the female should decide that she may actually be a true submissive, and find the courage and commitment to put herself in the hands of a true Master. She must know that at that precise moment her option to make choices will end. He will do what he wants to do, completely apart from her preconceived ideas.

I am not necessarily referring to physical discipline, and I am most definitely not referring to the extremes of physical discipline. There are always limits, and the true Master knows what they are. He also knows that those limits are different for every slave. But he also knows that regardless of those individually determined limits, every slave should at least once be forced to go one step beyond what she believes she can endure.

Mistress eris and her slave

2008-10-19T16:57:00.000-07:00

This is one of my favorite scene were i see a real slave submissively dominated by her mistress as this slave became a human ashtray and shoe cleaner of a real dominate mistress. It is just another ordinary night when mistress eris come home from work and she is doing so home work at her place but just as ordinary night mistress eris slave is always there to pleasure her with a nice shoe cleaning and by licking mistress eris foot. Mistress eris also pleasure her slave by letting her lick her nice juicy pussy while the submissive slave is wearing his collar. So if you want to see more BDSM and Fetish movies you can always visit slaveduties.com and fetishstudy.com.

Submissive slave sucking

2008-10-16T01:04:00.000-07:00

Nothing Beats a Submissive slave sucking and it is the best way of pleasuring your master by giving him a nice warm mouth licking your master's cock. As a real submissive i always love to suck and be brutalize and punish by master as he tie me with a rope master ordered me to suck him and pleasure him by letting him suck his nice juicy cock . This is always been the best thing that will happen to me and this is the right way to enjoy BDSM lifestyle and i totally enjoying it.

Submissive slave

2008-08-15T11:15:00.000-07:00

Here is maya matthews training to be a real submissive slave here is a great scene at one of the video of the training of o and as i see her all i ever see is a real girl that want to be a real submissive and she under go a real slave training. Maya Matthews is always known to be a great slave and as you watch this movie of her i am sure that some mistress will turn into switch or wanting you to have this slave as your slave as she enjoys the pleasure of being a real submissive slaves. images are from the training of o

Fetish Movies

2008-08-05T20:57:00.001-07:00

This is always been my favorite site fetishstudy is one of the best fetishtube that i have ever seen and it always make my fetish craving satisfy because of their great fetish videos.

Submissive slave

2008-06-12T11:02:00.000-07:00

Here is a picture of a gorgeous and sexy submissive she is a hot and gorgeous blond and a slave of her master. it is a nice and seductive pictures of the hottest and hottest submissive slave. A Submissive slave is a slave that is love to be dominate by his or her master or mistress, A sub enjoys the feeling of being humiliated and bondagely abuse.

Ten rules of BDSM

2008-03-24T20:48:00.000-07:00

1. Be patient!
Dominant: Until you enter into a contract or an otherwise formalized and negotiated relationship or situation with a submissive, you have no more right to order him/her around than does anyone else. Give your submissive time to get to know you and what you are like. Finesse and subtlety are major elements of dominance. Similarly, strength and gentleness go hand in hand. The sensitivity and awareness (or lack thereof) that you show in the real world is likely to be repeated in the playroom.

Submissive: A potential dominant will let you know if (s)he is interested in you or not. Keep in mind that your purpose as a submissive is to serve and to satisfy someone who will take into consideration the realization of your fantasies. Don't expect your dominant to be able to turn on like a light switch. The timing must be right for both of you.

2. Be humble
Dominant: You may be Gods' gift to the world, but no one needs to hear it or wants to hear it. You will have ample opportunities to show how good you are - and plenty of opportunities to make a fool of yourself. No matter what you claim, the "real you" will show through in a scene. Don't set yourself up for a failure by developing expectations that you know you can never reach.

Submissive: You may be God's gift to the world and the most sought after prize in town, but no one needs to hear it or wants to hear it. You will have ample opportunity to show how good you are. No matter what you claim, the "real you" will show through in a scene. Don't set yourself up for failure by developing expectations that you know you and your dominant can never reach.

3. Be open.
Dominant: Although the dominant is classically considered to be the teacher in BDSM, you can always learn from your submissive, no matter how inexperienced. Be willing to learn from other dominants who may have a totally different perspective from yours. Try to approach by-now-familiar trips with an attitude of wonderment and discovery. Be aware that everyone has her or his own personal style.

Submissive: You can learn something about BDSM and about yourself from everyone into the scene, no matter how experienced or inexperienced they are, or how dominant or submissive they are. BDSM is a very personal art, and an "I already know it all" attitude will make you miss valuable lessons and experiences, and ignore potentially valuable BDSM friends.

4. Communicate!
Dominant: You are responsible for finding out basic, essential information about the people you play with, such as experience, limits, likes and dislikes, and health information. Playing BDSM without this knowledge is like Russian roulette. Talk about your head-space and your view of erotic power exchange with your submissive, so that any uncertainties can be dealt with before you start playing. Clearly spell out roles, rules, limits, and contracts. Do not take for granted that your submissive instinctively knows the ground rules.

Submissive: Verbalization is necessary, but at the appropriate time and in the appropriate way. Your dominant needs to know basic information about you, such as experiences, fantasies, health concerns, and turn-offs. But - unless it's an emergency - wait until your dominant asks. Don't expect your dominant to be a mind-reader or clairvoyant who instinctively knows your needs, wants, and limits. Your cooperation will enhance the scene for both of you.

5. Be honest
Dominant: If you lack experience in an area that your submissive would like to experiment with, be honest about it. Your partner has a right to know that. Be honest with yourself and take your submissive only to those levels at which you are completely in control of the situation. Safety should always be the first concern, taking priority over how hot a particular scene is.

Submissive: Don't be afraid to share your needs and fantasies. Your dominant expects it. Honesty about your wants, health concerns, and turn-offs is essential to a good scene. Lying or being less than candid can only lead to problems, as the dominant will base the scene on inaccurate information. Besides causing problems, it can be dangerous.

6. Be sensitive
Dominant: There's a very fine line between a sensitive, caring dominant and a self-righteous, insensitive overbearing clod. Your scene should be a creative synthesis of your needs and fantasies and your submissive's needs and fantasies. Although, on the surface, your submissive is serving you, what actually is happening is that dominant and submissive are serving each other. Earn the complete trust of your submissive and never violate or even threaten to violate that trust. His or her submission is something, shared you. Use it appropriately.

Submissive: Your scene is a two-way street. It is not just the physical realization of your prior fantasies. If you want to limit your experience to certain physical and psychological stimulation, then contract with your dominant ahead of time. But don't always expect your dominant to be a puppet in a fantasy play you've written in your head. It's far better to let your dominant surprise you, to extend your limits, to take you to places you're never been before. When you trust your dominant completely, let her or him know it, and let him or her guide you into new fantasies.

7. Be realistic
Dominant: End the scene with the submissive wanting more, not wishing there had been less. Remember that power, control, and sensitivity are the keys, not just the intensity of the stimulation. Be clear about what is fantasy, and has little to do with what works in practice. Your favorite porno picture books may be stimulating in themselves, but don't try to imitate them to the last detail.

Submissive: Your dominant is human, and even the most experienced dominants have moments of awkwardness and indecision. Don't call attention to what you perceive as a lapse. Know the difference between this and the fantasy world you see in books and magazines. Few dominants are rich enough to afford a large dungeon with a lavish layout of equipment. Your dominant's equipment is expensive - respect it and don't abuse it.

8. Be really dominant!
Dominant: Submissives are looking for someone who will take over their body and mind, not just for brute strength. Real people are wanted, not just cardboard images from cigarette ads or macho stereotypes. Your dominance enhances your whole existence. It does not cover up or substitute for other areas of your life - it is you. Make your submissive fall in love with you, and expect him or her to give him/herself up to you totally. Follow up on rules, expect obedience, and punish appropriately when it is called for. Don't shirk your responsibility to your submissive or fellow dominants. Be dependable and expect dependability. You have agreed to take the dominant role - now take it!

Submissive: This is the whole point. Let your dominant take you over completely. Don't coach or second guess or be critical of your dominant. Exchange information on your special needs before the scene starts, but once it starts be quiet! If you insist on running a scene to your own specifications, then you should try being a dominant. You have agreed to limitations of your own power. Stay within those limitations. Respect and obey if you don't. Accept it gracefully and cheerfully. Your dominant has many things to be concerned with, including your safety and what turns you on. Be loyal and dependable and enjoy your role.

9. Be healthy!
Dominant: Like any strenuous activity, SM requires that its participants be in top physical and emotional health. Many factors, including the amount you sleep, your eating habits, and your alcohol and drug intake affect your performance and endurance during a scene. Don't attempt to do BDSM when your physical or emotional energy is low. As a dominant you have a special responsibility to be in control of yourself and on top of the scene. An attitude of "drugs and alcohol don't affect me that much... I can do it anyway" violates your submissives trust in you and can be dangerous. If you don't want to accept the responsibilities, you shouldn't be playing the game!

Submissive: BDSM, like any strenuous activity, requires that its participants - both active and passive - be in top physical and emotional health. The amount you sleep, your eating habits, your alcohol and drug intake, and everyday stress affect your response and endurance during a scene. Your dominant needs to know when your physical or emotional energy is low. No matter how tempting a scene sounds, an "I want it all now" attitude when you aren't able to give your all will leave both of you feeling let down. You serve your dominant and yourself best by staying healthy.

10. Have fun!
Dominant: After all, sex is all about having a good time. You have earned, and you are entitled to the unique, intense pleasures which come from responsible, creative SM play.

Submissive: After all, sex is all about having a good time. You have earned, and you are entitled to the unique, intense pleasure which comes from responsible, creative SM play.

Facesitting

2008-03-17T03:44:00.000-07:00

Facesitting, also known as kinging or queening, is a sexual practice in which one partner sits on or over the other's face, typically to allow oral-genital or oral-anal contact, or to further ass worship or body worship. It is common for this position to form part of BDSM, involving dominance and submission, though this need not be the case.

Facesitting is most common among homosexuals, dominant women and submissive men, but also vice-versa, for demonstrating superiority and for sexual gratification. It is also practiced by vanilla sex couples for cunnilingus where the woman kneels over the man, and sits on his upper chest rather than face.

Unlike facesitting, in smothering the smothered partner is deprived of air.

The full-weight body-pressure, moisture, sex odors and darkness can be perceived as powerful sexual attractions or compulsions. The person sat upon may be in bondage, sexually submissive, or simply held down by the body-weight of the other person. Sometimes special furniture is used, such as a smotherbox or queening stool.

Difference between BDSM play and torture

2008-03-16T02:18:00.000-07:00

Which made me think about the real difference between bdsm play and torture.

The techniques may be similar, even, on occasion, as in waterboarding, exactly the same. But there the similarity ends. In BDSM, the intense practice may be an hour, but its more likely to be just a few minutes and rarely, it may be longer. There will be a build up to the practice, in which trust is built between top and bottom, even if the actual words and expression don't make this obvious. The intense practice itself induces huge panic and maybe intense pain (sensation is a better, less emotive word) that may overcome the initial trust, leading to the classic 'head fuck' which is largely the point of the exercise. But regardless of the head fuck, there IS knowledge, at some level, that trust remains.

After the practice, the bottom will be held and nurtured, again, this is true even if some of the practice looks, on the surface, different (I'm thinking of the sort of scene where the slave may just be chucked in a cage afterwards, but however care-less it may look, it never is).

Compare this with torture practice. There is absolutely no trust established first, exactly the opposite, there is no knowledge, at any level, that the subject will be looked after, and there is no promise of aftercare, and certainly no more than the medical minimum. Practice may continue for days. This is not a head fuck as we know it, it is a psychological insult that is very real.

I raise this issue because its easy to want to portray bdsm practice as similar to 'real' torture, as it is to want bdsm type rape fantasy to be in some way similar to the real rape, because in that brief moment, under careful control, the bottom can feel something similar to the real insult. For whatever reason, that experience is important. But, to the world outside bdsm looking in, its in our interest to be careful that we do highlight how our practice is ultimately nurturing and not actually similar to the real thing.

Bondage beauties

2008-02-28T02:48:00.000-08:00

f you’re a newcomer to bondage, set your sights on the Sportsheets Beginner’s Bondage Kit or the virgin-white Sportsheets Tie The Knot Bondage Kit. You can then work your way through the Sportsheets Sexy Slave Bondage Kit, Lovers Prisoner Kit or Under The Bed Restraint System.

Handcuffs should also be a bondage staple, so bring out your authoritive but kinky side with a set of Furry Handcuffs and Glow In The Dark Handcuffs, or enjoy the cold sensation of Steel Wrist and Ankle Cuffs.

If you feel that the look of bondage is just as important as the act itself, then kit yourself out in the Ultimate Leather Cat Mask, Rivetted Leather Collar with D Ring and Lock and Chain Leather Ankle Restraints, while teasing your nipples with the Squeezer Teaser Nipple Clamps, Deluxe Pulsating Nipple Clamps and Nipple Chain Clasps.

BDSM

2008-02-28T02:45:00.000-08:00

BDSM - In the terms of sexual interactions and physical demonstrations, this acronym stands for Bondage, Discipline, Sadism and Masochism. It refers to the acts of, or participating in activities that include:

Bondage: the practice of being restrained, physically, by the means of devices such as cuffs or rope.

Discipline: refers to the process of punishing or being punished.

Sadism: coined as a term in reference to the Marquis de Sade, this term refers to deriving pleasure or personal gratification from causing or being a part of causing pain, suffering, or cruelty in a variety of degrees.

Masochism: coined as a term in reference to Leopold von Sacher-Masoch, (author of Venus in Furs); this term is associated with receiving pleasure from mental, emotional, or physical pain or humiliation, also in varying degrees,

Origin of BDSM

2008-02-21T06:37:00.000-08:00

The historical origins of BDSM are obscure. During the 9th century BC, ritual flagellations were performed in Artemis Orthia, one of the most important religious areas of ancient Sparta, where the Cult of Orthia, a preolympic religion, was practiced. Here ritual flagellation called diamastigosis took place on a regular basis. One of the oldest graphical proofs of sadomasochistic activities is found in an Etruscan burial site in Tarquinia. Inside the Tomba della Fustigazione (Flogging grave), in the latter 6th century b.c., two men are portrayed flagellating a woman with a cane and a hand during an erotic situation.^[81]^[82] Another reference related to flagellation is to be found in the 6th book of the Satires of the ancient Roman Poet Juvenal (1st - 2nd century ad), further reference can be found in The Satyricon of Petronius where a delinquent is whipped for sexual arousal.^[85] Anecdotal narratives related to humans who have had themselves voluntary bound, flagellated or whipped as a substitute for sex or as part of foreplay reach back to the 3rd and 4th century.

The Kama Sutra describes four different kinds of hitting during lovemaking, the allowed regions of the human body to target and different kinds of joyful "cries of pain" practiced by bottoms. The collection of historic texts related to sensuous experiences explicitly emphasizes that impact play, biting and pinching during sexual activities should only be performed consensually since some women do not consider such behavior to be joyful. From this perspective the Kama Sutra can be considered as one of the first written resources dealing with sadomasochistic activities and safety rules Further texts with sadomasochistic connotation appear worldwide during the following centuries on a regular basis.

There are anecdotal reports of people willingly being bound or whipped, as a prelude to or substitute for sex, during the fourteenth century. The medieval phenomenon of courtly love in all of its slavish devotion and ambivalence has been suggested by some writers to be a precursor of BDSM. Some sources claim that BDSM as a distinct form of sexual behavior originated at the beginning of the eighteenth century when Western civilization began medically and legally categorizing sexual behavior (see Etymology). There are reports of brothels specializing in flagellation as early as 1769, and John Cleland's novel Fanny Hill, published in 1749, mentions a flagellation scene. Other sources give a broader definition, citing BDSM-like behavior in earlier times and other cultures, such as the medieval flagellates and the physical ordeal rituals of some Native American societies.

Although the names of the Marquis de Sade and Leopold von Sacher-Masoch are attached to the terms sadism and masochism respectively, Sade's way of life is not meeting with modern BDSM standards of informed consent.^[91] BDSM ideas and imagery have existed on the fringes of Western culture throughout the twentieth century. Robert Bienvenu attributes the origins of modern BDSM to three sources, which he names as "European Fetish" (from 1928), "American Fetish" (from 1934), and "Gay Leather" (from 1950). Another source are the sexual games played in brothels, which go back into the nineteenth century if not earlier. Irving Klaw, during the 1950s and 1960s, produced some of the first commercial film and photography with a BDSM theme (most notably with Bettie Page) and published comics by the now-iconic bondage artists John Willie and Eric Stanton.

Stanton's model Bettie Page became at the same time one of the first successful models in the area of fetish photography and one of the most famous pin-up girls of American mainstream culture. Italian author and designer Guido Crepax was deeply influenced by him, coining the style and development of European adult comics in the second half of the 20th century. The artists Helmut Newton and Robert Mapplethorpe are the most prominent examples of the increasing use of BDSM-related motives in modern photography and the public discussions still resulting from this.

Prejudices

2008-02-21T06:35:00.000-08:00

Understanding of BDSM culture and practices remains intertwined with prejudices, clichés and stereotypes. Misunderstandings may arise from general lack of knowledge concerning sexuality and sexual practices as well as misconceptions on how one's personal life and public persona can vary greatly. For example, it is sometimes assumed that a submissive would prefer to experience pain and degradation in their everyday life, or conversely, that they would prefer to have exactly the opposite. There is no clear correlation between the position in everyday life and BDSM preferences. A further misunderstanding is that members of BDSM communities want only to be hurt or to inflict physical, psychological and mental pain, which diminishes and disparages the emotional and spiritual relationships that develop.^[42]

Another misconception is the idea of women generally being the dominant part in BDSM relationships. Quite often the picture of BDSM is reduced to the idea of crude corporal punishment, neglecting the broad spectrum of behaviors within the culture. Along with the whip-swinging dominatrix, the sadomasochist in full leather regalia is another common cliché. While overlaps between different kinds of fetishism can exist, there is no inevitable connection between BDSM and fetishisms (eg: Latex, pvc or leather). The frequent occurrence of such clothing can be partly explained by its function as a quasi-formalized dress code. The relative openness towards alternative lifestyles results in fetishisms being more substantially lived within the culture of BDSM than in other cultures.

Since the term BDSM covers several different aspects and these occur with varying emphasis, the arising spectrum of individual interests and personalities is large and extremely diverse. Due to the lack of information in the total population and the reluctance with many to come out about matters of an extremely personal nature leads to situations in which actions and statements of individual BDSM practitioners are accredited to the community at large just as the larger LGBT community has been characterized by drag queens and other minority communities similarly mischaracterized.

At least in the western, industrialized countries and Japan, since the 1980s sadomasochists have begun to form information exchange and support groups to counter discriminatory images. This has happened independently in the United States and in several European countries. With the advent of the web, international cooperation has started to develop — for example Datenschlag is a joint effort of sadomasochists in the three major German-speaking countries, and the mailing list Schlagworte uses the model of a news agency to connect six countries. Some credit highly publicized events like Operation Spanner and the International leather contests with fostering international cooperation and collaboration.

Types of collars

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Collar Of Consideration. "The exploring stage" this collar is traditionally given at the very beginning of a potential relationship. This is expressing an interest in pursuing a relationship with a submissive beyond that of a casual acquaintance. The collar acts to openly declare to other dominant's that this submissive is "off-limits" and that honourable dominant's should not pursue this submissive in any manner.

Training Collar. This collar represents the second collar exchanged between a dominant and a submissive. This is offered by the dominant after they have engaged in a period of time where they have held extensive lifestyle conversations and explored each others sexual needs, desires, personalities, dreams, hopes and goals in order to see if they prove to be a good match enough to move into a relationship of a deeper commitment. Most enter a deeper emotional stage at this point and may begin to express true devotion, love, honour and mutual respect.

Formal Or Slave Collar. This is the representation of the final stage of commitment. It expresses the belief that the dominant and submissive share a genuine and growing desire to share in each others lives, perhaps the rest of their lives.

Everydayslaves freeview

2008-01-31T03:00:00.001-08:00

Domination and submission

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Domination and submission (also known as D&s, Ds or D/s) is a set of behaviors, customs and rituals relating to the giving and accepting of dominance of one individual over another in an erotic or lifestyle context.

Physical contact is not a necessity, and it can even be conducted anonymously over telephone, email or instant messaging services. In other cases it can be intensely physical, sometimes traversing into sadomasochism. In D/s, one takes pleasure or erotic enjoyment out of either dominating or being dominated. Those who take the superior position are called dominants, doms (male) or dommes (female), while those who take the subordinate position are called submissives or subs (male or female). A switch is an individual who plays in either role. Two switches together may negotiate and exchange roles several times in a session. "Dominatrix" is a term usually reserved for a female professional dominant who dominates others for pay.

Domination and submission

2008-01-03T05:38:00.000-08:00

Domination and submission (also known as D&s, Ds or D/s) is a set of behaviors, customs and rituals relating to the giving and accepting of dominance of one individual over another in an erotic or lifestyle context. It explores the more mental aspect of BDSM. This is also the case in many relationships not considering themselves as sadomasochistic; it is considered to be a part of BDSM if it is practiced cognizantly. The range of its individual characteristics is thereby wide.

Examples of mentally orientated practices are education games, during which the dominant requires certain forms of behavior from the submissive. Special forms include erotic roleplay like ageplay, in which a difference in age, either real or enacted, formulates the background; or petplay. Concerted deployed sexual rejection exercised on the partner can be an aspect of Dominance and Submission as well. The most established and probably most cliché set form of dominance and submission is dominance and slavedom. These can be administrated for the short duration of a session among otherwise-emancipated partners, but also can be integrated into everyday life indefinitely. In a few relationships, it leads as far as total submission of one partner in the truest sense of the phrase total power exchange. Compensating elements of the total domination and submission are care and devotion complementing one another, thus facilitating stable relationships.

Bondage couple

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Although reliable data is unavailable, the financial success of companies that market bondage equipment testifies to the fact that it is more than fantasy to many; it is plausible that a sizeable proportion of couples have made regular use of bondage in their sexual activities at some point in their relationships. This is especially plausible considering that common household items can be used for play, such as rope for restraint or a padlock for a ball lock.

For the most part, such bondage games end in sex. In contrast, bondage games between more casually acquainted players in the BDSM subculture frequently end in masturbation only, or in some cases include no sexual release at all.

Safety rules followed by couples in a committed relationship are frequently more subjective and trust-based. These differences can lead to culture clash where a couple with a history of bondage games together encounters the BDSM subculture: the couple can't understand the insistence on safewords, while the members of the subculture can't understand the focus on sexual intercourse.